Anyone know any coffee jokes?

[Bam Bam]

Other than "Thanks a latte!"

[Lorenzo Perkins]

soon followed by . . . "Have a grande!"

[miKe mcKoffee aka Mike McGinness]

Had my annual physical. My doctor told me I've been dead for three weeks but all he espresso I drink has been keeping me going... (Owners like me who work almost 24/7 should relate:-)

[Jonathan Aldrich]

"why is all coffee like teenagers? it gets grounded!" (dan streetman)

[Jared Rutledge]

fixed!
Neal Cowan said:

Celine Dion trots into a Philly coffee bar; the coffee slinger looks up from his steaming pitcher and asks her "...so what's with the long face?..."

[Bam Bam]

Wait ... I don't get it.

Neal Cowan said:

"Why do you think they call it...doppio?"

[Dirk Maritz]

dont moch a coffee

[Jared Rutledge]

haha that only works in certain english speaking countries! in the USA and i would imagine canada we say "MOE-ka" whereas in australia, SA, NZ, etc. they say "MOCK-ah"

at any rate, wokka wokka wokka

Dirk Maritz said:

dont moch a coffee

[Dinah]

This is a play on the old joke, Why do you think they call it "dope"


Bam Bam said:

Wait ... I don't get it.

Neal Cowan said:

"Why do you think they call it...doppio?"

[Bam Bam]

Looks like SOMEBODY'S old .... ;)

Neal Cowan said:

Bam Bam said:

Wait ... I don't get it.

Neal Cowan said:

"Why do you think they call it...doppio?"

Study your history...

Nancy Reagan once coined the adage "...So why do you think they call it D-O-P-E?...?

[Bam Bam]

I'll start saving my allowance.

Neal Cowan said:

Bam Bam said:

Looks like SOMEBODY'S old .... ;)

I am not too old, Bam Bam, to recognize that the response you were looking for was ":)", and not ";)"

Your simultaneous "old" & "new" friend,

Neal C.
aka "Fred Flintstoned"

P.S. I will be celebrating my 50th B-day next February 11th. To commemorate a half century of roaming this planet, a group of my friends are chipping in to purchase a walker for me. The only other gift I would appreciate receiving on that date is a box of Depends; if you would be so kind to take care of that one, then I could check it off my list. Thanks in advance.

[Maggie Cook]

The best one I've heard is Starbucks

[RoasterDave]

Yeah, call up your coffee shop and ask them if the espresso machine is running, when they say yes tell them to go catch it. Just make sure you don't use your own cell phone to call cause then they'll know it's you and then it's not funny anymore...